Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
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