You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
