nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
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