She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
