He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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