what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Randomize
