what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
