No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
