im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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