Ambien. No doubt about it.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
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