is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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