You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
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