Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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