how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
