i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Randomize