its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
