Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
