I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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