To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
im holly from the hills drunk
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
