I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
