Soap is not a condiment
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
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