My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Too much gin, very little bucket
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
