I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
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