I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
