Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
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