I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
