Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Randomize
