I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I supernannyed him into submission
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
