I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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