nutella sex= disaster
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize
