He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
