He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
