I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
As shirtless as possible
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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