If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Randomize
