So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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