Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
