You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Randomize
