Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
