So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I just blew my weed a kiss
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Randomize
