white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
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