nut hugger
6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize