its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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