i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
