He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
