I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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