Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
