found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
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