this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
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