Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
