i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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