Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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